Super Astrid

Astrid got a toy picnic kit for Christmas. A week or two ago, she kept flipping the picnic blanket over her head. I thought she was trying to wear it, like a cape, so I stuck it down the back of her shirt.

And then, SUPER ASTRID was born!


What a back story. So deep and full of angst and darkness. *sarcasm*

Ready for takeoff!


And she's off!


Faster than a speeding milk bottle. Able to crawl over the most difficult obstacles in search of the "path of most resistance".

Now whenever she gets a hold of a kitchen towel, she tries to do the same with it as the picnic cloth. Kyra got so annoyed with her stealing the kitchen towels that she got her a new one just for her. It's now sitting with the rest of the toys in the living room.

In other news, Astrid likes her hat, too.


What a goon. She does have a refined side.


At least for a moment.


It doesn't last long.

Kyra and Astrid are home now full time. It seems to be going well. Kyra is happier and better rested. Astrid is napping better and longer (she has dropped her morning nap, though). I enjoy seeing both of them when I take a break from work. The days seem to go by faster with them home.

Occasionally, Astrid appears to get bored, but Kyra has a lot of plans to keep busy, especially this summer with the garden. I'm looking forward to seeing a "dirt baby" run around in our backyard. In the meantime, there's swimming, walks, and reading time at the library.

Of A Few Weeks

Some time ago, Kyra and I decided to volunteer for a non-profit organization focused on reducing suicides, especially among veterans, which was started by a family friend. I've been helping with technical aspects, like getting a website up and running and setting up email based on the website. Kyra has been participating by helping design business cards, event planning, and volunteering. As a part of her volunteer work, she decided to go to a conference co-sponsored by the organization in Washington, DC. The conference intended to bring more awareness to the issue and included a march to the capitol, and it was held a couple of weeks ago.

The weekend and week prior to the event was an interesting one. Kyra spent a lot of time getting ready for the trip. On Thursday, the day before her flight, Luca got sick: he apparently threw up. Although there were a number of kids getting sick, it seemed like the reason he threw up was because he stuck his hand down his throat, possibly to get a leaf out that he had attempted to eat. On the same day, I had some family troubles to deal with, resulting in a long stressful day. The next day, Kyra left for her flight with the help of our friend LP (thank you!), and I stayed home with Luca, even though Luca appeared to be fine and that day was the last day I could get into the database at work since they were going to upgrade it. Fortunately, I was able to work from home for about half of the day and it turned out that although the upgrade took longer than usual, it was okay within a few days.

So Kyra left for DC and Luca and I spent the weekend together by ourselves. We went to swimming lessons, shopped for groceries, cleaned house, played at the park—all the usually family stuff. Saturday night, unfortunately, I broke out with an allergic reaction at about 11:30 pm, long after Luca had been asleep. I was very nervous about this since I was home alone, but I did the usual thing and took an anti-histamine and waited until the reaction subsided. I wasn't clear whether I was having breathing problems or not, and that's why I stayed up late. The next morning I was so groggy from the medicine that, after breakfast, I went back to bed and let Luca play with the baby monitor on (yes, I made sure everything was safe first). He woke me up a couple of hours later yelling, "Baba! I went poop!". Eventually we figured out that I'm allergic to limes. Not the insides, however, just the peel!

Later Sunday morning we had brunch at Nick and LP's, which I was very grateful for after the night I had. And we finally watched Cars from beginning to end. Sunday night, Luca and I had to pick up Kyra from the airport, and I thought it would be fun to go star gazing beforehand, since we needed to stay up late. We went out of the city a little way and looked at the moon with binoculars. We saw a few stars, but there really was too much light pollution to see very well. Eventually we went over to the airport and watched planes land while we waited for Kyra's plane. Other than the allergic reaction, Luca and I had a really good weekend together.

Then it was quickly back to work, with barely any time to adjust from the weekend. The next weekend I saw Tammy Baldwin speak about health care reform, and Kyra and I attended the first Madison Symphony Orchestra concert of the season (with Andre Watts!). On another weekend, we attended our community farm's barn party, which was great fun, with good food, good people, and good music. The weekend after that Kyra and Luca went to the Twin Cities to visit family, while I stayed home and completed "spring" cleaning. (Boy, that was way overdue!) While there, they had a birthday party for Luca since Kyra's family won't be able to make it to the party here. They had a special royal theme, and if you want to see photos of the event, you'll have to ask!

Next week is Luca's 3rd birthday, and both Kyra and I are taking the day off to spend with him. Then we'll have the party with a hay ride and smores the day after. Halloween will be soon, and it seems like Thanksgiving his heading at us like a freight train. It's been a crazy, busy summer and fall, with lots of excitement and stress, but I've spent it with some great people whom I love. Here's to a great summer!

Day at the Fair

Last Friday was my last day of work at the old job, and next Monday is the first day at the new job, which means I've had a week off! So what did I do? Mostly cleaned our house. Today, though, I took Luca to the county fair.

First, we went to see the animals. We saw horses, sheep, chickens, rabbits, ducks, turkey, cows, pigs, and llamas. Then we stopped to have a snack: mini doughnuts, fresh squeezed lemonade, and fried cheddar cheese. Yum! We went inside to the convention center where it was air conditioned and browsed some of the exhibits. I still had some chores to do at home (like grocery shopping), so I took Luca back to school. He fell asleep on the way there.

I hope you had a good morning at the fair with baba! Maybe next time we'll go on some rides and eat cotton candy!

The Holidays and Todllerhood

We had a great holiday season! We spent Christmas Eve with Kyra's family, eating, opening presents, and watching a talent show. Christmas day, Kyra made a turkey dinner with all the fixings, and I made a pie. It was a spectacular meal! Kyra's dad, my sister and brother and his girlfriend, and our friend Carla joined us. New Year's Eve we dropped off Luca with my parents and attended a games party. We stayed until midnight for the first time in a couple of years!

By the way, thank you to everyone for the gifts! I've been enjoying the music from the CDs (listening to Appalachia Waltz right now with Yo-Yo Ma, Edgar Meyer, and Mark O'Connor - it's beautiful) and the portable HD radio, the beautiful picture books, and the new camera. Luca and Kyra have been enjoying their gifts as well! Thank you!

We decided that after the holidays we would wean Luca from the nukie and the crib. Kyra's dad informed us of a friend who was giving away a toddler bed designed like a firetruck. I picked it up Monday last week and set it up right away.

That night, Luca woke up at 10 pm or so, and didn't fall back asleep until about 2 am. The next night we tried again. He woke up at 11 pm and stayed up again until 2 am. I feel like Luca is too young, mentally, for this transition, and I have a very busy month at work. So, I set the crib backup and partially dismantled the bed.

We have, however, been trying to wean him from the nukie. He wakes up occasionally and cries for a bit, usually around 11 pm and 3 am. He must have used the nukie at these times to calm himself and fall back asleep, but now without it he has to figure out a new way of calming himself. We've decided that unless he's really freaking out that it's more disruptive for us to go in his bedroom. All in all, sleeping has been rough lately. We'll try again in a few months with the toddler bed, hopefully when it's not so busy!

It would also help if Luca could burn some energy outside, but it's been so cold we can't take him out. Getting him enough exercise in the winter has been a bit of a challenge, but malls help a lot with that! Last weekend we took him to a mall with a play area. The next day we took him to a mall without a play area, but took the shopping cart he received from Carla for his birthday. He pushed it around for a while, then investigated the stairs and lights. He also enjoyed the coin-slot firetruck that moved back and forth.

He's been very cute lately, walking around and talking to himself. He babbles quite a bit for a 1-year-old. He's saying a number of words on occasion, including girl (although not boy), ball, cat, dog, car, eat, rock (as in "rock in a chair"), cow, socks, truck, book, nana (banana), along with some associated sounds, like meow, bark, and moo. We think he also calls the cat "mas" (Mars) with a slight "r" sound. One of my favorite questions to ask him is, "What do you want to do today, Luca?" and he responds, "Eat!" while making the sign for it. Hilarious!

On the other hand, we have some challenges with his behavior. He hits a lot - the TV, us, little girls. We're not sure why he does it so much - perhaps it's simply the sensory feedback or maybe he likes what he hits. We instruct him to be "gentle" and show him how to touch gently. He is also very rough with our cat, as I've mentioned before. Of course, he still throws tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants or when we redirect his behavior.

Aside from these challenges, Luca is a very good boy. He likes to cuddle and hug, he's quite independent and curious, and he loves to read. I can't wait to see what he'll be like in the new year!

Fine in Nine

Luca and I just got back from his nine month checkup. We're both pretty happy considering he didn't have to have any shots this time. This means no cranky baby and no fever. Vital stats are as follows:

Weight: 25lbs

Length: 30"

Head Size: 41cm

Luca is now fully mobile. He crawls with great speed and crawls up on everything he can get his little fingers around (and some things he can't). Daily Chris and I have to put things up higher, back farther, or away completely as his range extends. He also has taken some tentative steps along the furniture and from one piece to another. His two front top teeth are coming in slowly but surely. He can now eat most soft table foods, and loves feeding himself. This may be significantly messier, but I appreciate having both hands to eat with again!

As Chris mentioned, sleeping has been a bit rough of late. Honestly I think it's a phase. The positive is he is no longer nursing at night, which I am ecstatic about. Now instead of having to get up at night I can send Chris to take care of him. Te he he.

This week I started at a new job. I am working at a brand new preschool on the west side. And I mean BRAND NEW, we have no kids yet and are still setting up furniture. The bonus is I get to take Luca with me to work. At the moment I have been looking after him myself, but once we get kids he will be in the infant room with the other babies, and I'll be teaching the older preschoolers. He loves the new variety of toys, most of which play some type of annoying music, but napping has been a challenge. Luca is anti-napping-in-anywhere-that's-not-my-crib. And I don't think it will get any better when it is someone else trying to put him to sleep. I'm sure he'll adjust though. Eventually.

I can already tell Luca's more tired during the day, due to the lack of naps. Today I came home (I worked a half day today) and he slept for two hours SOLID, on his own, in his crib. This hardly ever happens. And yesterday he fell asleep while I was feeding him lunch. It was so funny to see his head nodding and his eyes drooping while he was chewing that I kept laughing and waking him up. Here is a picture I managed to snap when I finally stopped laughing:



And here is a lovely example of Luca's (non-existent) table manners:



And here is where we stuck an banana sticker to his forehead. He is not amused:



Then he read the sticker ("Place sticker on forehead. Smile.") and got the joke:



Happy Days!

Sleepmare

So Luca hasn't been sleeping very well again. Kyra says it's one of those times again when he has something going on, who knows what, that makes him clingy and not want to sleep. (He's been really clingy in the morning when I leave for work. Kind of cute, but Kyra has to deal with him screaming when I walk out the door.) We've been trying to intervene as little as possible when he wakes up, but when he hasn't been sleeping well or we just want to go back to sleep, it's hard to try for a few minutes, then stop.

Typically what we do is give him his nukie, touch his back, and let him get comfortable. Kyra seems to get him to sleep just by rubbing his back. Until tonight, I wasn't able to do it because I would let him have his stuffed tiger, which he would mess around with while lying down. It would keep him awake, but if I took it away, he would scream.

Now that I've realized it keeps him awake, I take it away from him earlier, and he seems to be less upset about it. I have a theory that perhaps he just doesn't get that he needs to stop moving around to go to sleep, so I've tried holding one of his arms down on his belly and holding his feet so he doesn't rub his eyes, kick, wiggle, try to grab something, or sit up. It's worked quite well, and he calms down, but perhaps it's too much intervention.

We've read a lot about sleep and everything. We have a bedtime routine, and he usually falls asleep while mommy's nursing him. We don't talk when we go in when he wakes up. So the problem is when he wakes up and needs to go back to sleep, he just doesn't seem to know how. Any ideas anyone?

P.S. I miss ballroom dance. :*(

Update on Status

Last night Kyra was able to open her eye a little, which is a good sign since she hasn't been able to open it for a couple of days now. I keep hoping they'll send her home tonight, but there's probably little chance of it. The funny thing is that she gets the drug she needs intravenously, then she sits around all day. She doesn't even have the IV connected. They're just "observing" her.

Luca and I have been faring well. The first night, just after the ER visit, it was difficult to get him to go to bed. He wanted mommy I'm sure, and he didn't want the bottle. I kept trying to feed him, and he would scream a lot then eat a little, then fall asleep. He did this over and over again every half-hour or so for a couple of hours, probably because he wasn't getting enough to eat. Then he slept until 4. At 4 I thought he would be hungry again, so when he started crying, I wrapped him up in a blanket and went to warm up the milk. When I returned, he was fast asleep! No food required!

Last night was a lot better. I fed him a whole bowl of infant rice cereal before bed, gave him a bath, attempted to give him the bottle, and when that failed, gave him a nukie and rocked him to sleep. It actually worked! He woke up once after that, but I simply touched his face and chest and he fell asleep again. A bit later he was crying again and he wouldn't be comforted, but then I turned him on his side and he seemed more comfortable once I calmed him down. He slept again until 4 and didn't require any food again.

So I think mommy's been doing lots of work just for his comfort! He probably doesn't need to be fed late at night, just wrapped up. Either way, we miss mommy a ton. We were at the hospital with her for 3 or 4 hours yesterday, but it's just not the same. Come home soon mommy!

In the Hospital Again

This week Kyra developed a skin infection around her eye. It was red and itchy, and then overnight last night it became very swollen, so much so that she could not open her eye. Yesterday she had gone to urgent care to be treated when it was itchy and red and not so swollen, and they gave her an oral antibiotic and told her to return in a day if it got worse.

This morning, it was so bad I had to drive her to urgent care because she couldn't see out of one eye. They gave her two injections of antibiotics in each thigh and sent her home again with the same message as before: return if it gets worse.

Well, it didn't get better, and it seemed to get more swollen. So tonight we went to the ER to see an infectious disease doctor. I stayed with her as long as Luca would put up with it. She had a CT scan and after she came back I went home to put Luca to bed. Now she's at the hospital getting IV antibiotics, and the doctor said she might be there all weekend. They don't want it to get in her eye and cause any other problems.

I have never taken care of Luca all by myself. I got him to sleep, and I have his un-frozen milk ready to go in a bottle for a late night feeding. Did I mention he hates the bottle? I miss my wife, and I'm worried about her too... This will be an interesting weekend...

Why I Love BBC

I have found the BBC is so much wittier than American news media. Take, for example, an excerpt from a recent article on sleep:

"For the sleep-starved parent, it can feel as though they've given birth to a temperamental air-raid siren. Their sleep fantasy is nothing more elaborate than a night alone and a long luxurious morning when they can wake up undisturbed. Maybe they could warm the room with a bonfire of all those smug-faced sleep training manuals."

I couldn't have said it better myself.

The Week from Hell

If it seems like Chris and I have fallen off the face of the earth this week, it's 'cause we have.

Our week from hell started last Friday night. Chris was recovering from a cold, doing quite well actually, but just to make sure he got a good night's sleep he took one more dose of cold medicine. About an hour later, after we had put Luca to bed and were watching a movie, he began to break out in a rash. Turns out he was having an allergic reaction to the cold medicine, which was shocking since he had been taking it all week. When the rash got worse the next day and his hands and feet started to swell, we made a trip to urgent care where, after waiting an hour to be seen they unhelpfully told us the only thing to do was keep taking an anti-histamine and wait for the reaction to get better.

Chris spent the next three days pretty miserable, basically sleeping through everything. Tuesday things seemed to be getting better, but then his cough, which he had had on and off throughout the cold became unbearable. Now, unable to take anything for fear of another allergic reaction, he was unable to sleep or even talk at times due to his coughing fits. This necessitated another trip to urgent care where they determined he had a sinus infection.

On top of all of this Luca hasn't been sleeping well. Last night we were convinced he was teething in earnest, as he woke up at 2am and screamed for an hour before he would even calm down, much less go to sleep. But this morning, I can't see or feel anything in his mouth and, other than being a bit tired, he seems none the worse for wear. So maybe, maybe not.

Maybe I was going crazy last night at 2am after getting a weekly total of 12 hours of sleep, but I was inspired to write a rather amusing (well, at 2am it seemed amusing) poem. I call it "The Teething March":

2am, the summoning
by the trumpet call, the baby's cry
to the midnight parade, to the death march.

Babe, dad, mom
the procession of sleepless warriors
the thud, thud, thud of our feet in the dark.

Bleary eyed, marching
the weary merry-go-round of parenting
again and again through silent, half-lit rooms.

Tired and groggy
we wear ruts in the floor as we drag our feet
to the silent, ceaseless drumming of the teething march.

Here's hoping next week improves. One would think it can only go up from here.

Live at Five (Months)

Luca is 5 months today. I feel I should point out (as Chris keeps reminding me) that I am counting in "lunar months", or periods of 4 weeks. Going by "calender months", he will be 5 months on the 14th. However, the doctor's office goes by lunar months and if its good enough for them its good enough for me.

I think from now on I will call them "Luca months". Haha, punny! Ok moving on...

The big improvement this month has been sleeping, which is getting back to a more reasonable amount. He now goes to bed around nine without too much difficulty, wakes around 1am to nurse, then sleeps until 5am or 6am. From everything I've read this is a pretty normal sleep cycle for breastfed babies, who don't usually sleep through the night until closer to a year. Unfortunately, Chris has a cold and Luca is starting to sound a bit snuffy, and the minute a baby gets a cold any hope of sleep goes out the window.

We started Luca on solids, and it's going fantastically. If there's one thing this kid knows how to do, it's eat. One of our baby books said to allow plenty of time for meals as babies may be more interested in playing with the food than eating it. Luca, however, is all business. He will even start to fuss if I don't feed him fast enough! He does like to play with the bowl when he's done though, and really likes the loud bang it makes when he repeatedly slams it against his high chair (maybe Chris was right: maybe he expects it to make music, like his gym). He also is exploring feeding himself, and will follow the spoon with his hand from the bowl to his mouth. Right now we are sticking to rice cereal, but I may try bananas in a week or so if things continue going well. Supposedly breast fed babies prefer bananas over cereal because they are sweet like breast milk.

Luca's new favorite toy is a jumperoo on loan from his cousin Lilianna. He hasn't quite figured out the whole jumping thing yet. He has it backwards at the moment: he will pick up his feet to get the saucer to move rather than put them down and push. We've also started "crawling", which at the moment is more of a swimming/squirming motion on his tummy while I put my hands behind his feet so he can push off. Luca seems to like the idea of self propulsion. This morning he got ambitious enough to actually put his knees under him and push, but he forgot about his arms and just managed to push himself along the floor on his forehead! It was too funny! He didn't find it nearly as amusing, but then I imagine rug burn on your forehead can't be very pleasant.

Awkward Positions

As noted in a previous entry, Luca has started sitting in a little chair designed to support infants as they learn to sit on their own. To some extent, Luca can sit on his own very briefly, leading to some rather awkward positions:







I especially like the drowsy look in the last shot. Or is he giving mommy some attitude?

Luca has also been learning to sit up in other places, too, like his bouncy chair:





I wasn't around when this happened, but Kyra told me that he had trouble figuring out how to lay back down. She had to help him get out of this awkward position.

Kyra's mom, Linda (aka nana), also taught Luca how to hold his feet. Now he does this frequently while lying down on the floor, in the bathtub, and on the changing table (which helps, actually!).







He seems rather happy that he's found his feet. And yes, he is busting out of his outfit.

One night, while eating, Kyra made a rather loud sound. Luca gave her this look, as if to say, "What was THAT?":



Just this weekend, we discovered, as nana predicted, Luca likes to sleep on his side. Here he is, after falling asleep lying on my arm.



I didn't want to move after he fell asleep. He was so warm and cuddly, and I didn't want to wake him up.

That night, he was so tired, I put him down in his crib, and he turned sideways and immediately fell asleep. Later, he was fussing and I went in and turned him on his side. He feel asleep instantly. If he could just stay on his side and sleep all night, it would be perfect. However, he still needs some help getting to and staying on his side. It gives us hope, though, that he call fall asleep so easily when in the right position.

Month Four Stats

Luca and I just got back from his 4 month checkup. His new stats are as follows:

Length: 27" (98th percentile)

Weight:19lbs 12.8oz (99th percentile)

Head Circumference: 43.8cm (88th percentile)

The doctor also gave us the go ahead to start him on some solid (well, semi-solid) foods, although it will just be baby cereal for the first month or so to avoid any nasty allergic reactions.

Many people swear by baby cereal to help baby sleep through the night, however the doctor cautioned us that this is more urban legend than anything else. Just like nearly everything with children, every one is different so what works for one may not work for another. She did give us some good advice on sleep though, including the assurance that it is ok that Luca still needs to be nursed and/or rocked to sleep. Apparently the whole putting ones self to sleep is more of a six month skill, so I can keep nursing him to sleep for a bit longer.

The other problem I expressed to her was that Luca seems to be waking up more frequently now than he did a month ago. I noted that in mid-January he would wake up only once during the night, nurse, and go back to sleep, and that his feeding at night spaced out to about every six hours. Now, however, he seems to wake up every three or four hours to nurse. The doctor said that if he has gone six hours in a stretch without feeding I should hold him to that, otherwise he will simply want to nurse every time he wakes up just to pacify himself. Human Pacifier: another role we moms are lucky enough to fill.

All of her advice came with the caveat I've heard since he was born: "But don't worry too much about it, he'll probably grow out of this phase in a few months." This is the eternal hope, and indeed for the most part the reality, of raising a baby, although there are times when you are just pulling your hair out in the interim.

Thankfully we have had some relief from the nightly sleep battles, which came courtesy of my mother who was being helpful without even realizing it. In conversation about the difference in sleeping habits between my niece and Luca, my mom mentioned that Lilianna had to sit upright for twenty minutes after eating or she would get terrible gas. So a few nights ago I tried it with Luca sitting him upright, asleep, after I had nursed him. Since then we have had only minimal fussing when I put him down, sometimes none at all. Hooray for trying everything you can think of then finally finding something that works! Silly guy, why didn't he just say he had gas?

Month Four: Still Screaming

Luca will be four months tomorrow and is rapidly growing out of his 6-9 month clothing. I keep trying to put him in at least a few of his adorable outfits (which he HATES), but I know some of them he will sadly never wear. Seriously, this kid needs to slow down. Here are some of his most recent fashion experiments.

His dinosaur outfit (p.s. he's been having some eye infection issues, which is why his eye is red):



I call this one "baby overalls with baby polo":



This one even comes with cute mommy attachment:



Note the "I hate you mom for putting me in this stupid thing" look.

Luca's newly developed interests include playing with rattles and the bumble bee on his bouncy seat, trying to chew on everything he can get his hands on, and sucking his thumb while poking himself in the eye (hence the eye infections). Some things have not changed though: He still is entertained by his gym, his swing (and the annoying synthesized "nature sounds"), and still HATES tummy time, although he is building more of a tolerance for it.

Luca has developed one particularly annoying habit, which is driving his father and me absolutely batty. I call it the "screaming syndrome", also known as "For God's Sake don't leave me alone for more than five seconds or you'll live to regret it." Apparently he has decided he doesn't want to be left alone. At all. Ever. I walk into the kitchen to get a snack, he starts to fuss. I go take a shower and get out to a screaming baby. Not that it stops me from doing any of this.

I'm operating under the (possibly erroneous) theory that eventually he will realize that I am indeed coming back, and more importantly, learn to entertain himself. But this kid has stamina, which makes things even worse when Chris and I try to put him to bed. We've tried nursing, rocking, bouncing, singing, reading, and several combinations thereof, all with the same result: a two-hour screaming match that leaves all three of us exhausted and traumatized, although Luca probably less so than Chris and me. Finally, on the advice of our pediatrician, we are now putting him to bed and letting him "fuss" on his own (although his fussing is less like fussing and more like screaming his cute little head off).

The hope is that eventually he will get bored/tired and learn to put himself to sleep on his own. Not that we've seen any results as of yet. The only difference it has made is Chris and I don't try to stop him from screaming now, at least not for the first hour. Then one of us (usually me) will get so fed up with it we go in and finally rock him to sleep.

I love Luca dearly, but this month has been exhausting. And no one can give us any helpful suggestions. No one seems to have encountered a kiddo quite like ours. Even my mom, in her vast experiences with children, can offer little but sympathy. It makes me wonder: am I the only mom who's baby screams for two hours before falling asleep? Why did I have to get the screaming, fussy baby? Do such thoughts make me a bad mom?

Two Good

Luca is two months old, a bit over actually, but I wanted to post after he got his two month checkup and give everyone his new stats:

Head: 41.5 cm (82nd percentile)
Length: 25" (97th percentile)
and drum roll please...
Weight: 16 lbs (99th percentile)! That's the size of an average four month old, by the way. Can we say gargantu-baby?

Other than that he is doing great. Chris and I are having a lot of fun with him. Luca is now smiling, cooing, and even giggling on occasion. He loves it when Chris comes home and "talks" to him, he just lights up with smiles. Luca is turning into a very social baby!

He really likes his overhead gym and now can get the music to play all by himself. He isn't really into many other toys as he isn't quite reaching for things yet. Once in a while when a rattle is right by his hands he tries to manipulate his fingers to hold it, but I think it will take a bit longer till he gets the muscle control to reach and grasp. He still does the flailing arm thing. Other milestones include holding his head up for about a minute when placed on his tummy (which he HATES!) or carried upright, and his acceptance (though not total enjoyment) of bath time.

Sleeping is going ok. He only wakes up once or twice during the night (once we finally get him to sleep that is) so I can't really complain. Chris and I swaddle him in a SwaddleMe generously gifted to us by our friend Marie, and it has helped immensely. Because of his constantly moving arms he will often wake himself up by hitting or sometimes scratching himself in the face if not swaddled. But he is getting rather big for his current swaddle, so we are going to try out the "Miracle Blanket" which got rave reviews on amazon.com (one woman claimed her son slept through the night instantly). I'll let you know how it works.

I'm doing well despite a rash of plugged ducts, which I am now taking a fat emulsifier to combat. Apparently my milk has a high fat content, which can make me more susceptible to plugged ducts. Does that mean I'm full of fat? I suppose its better than other things I could be full of...

More updates next month!

One Month Later

Luca is one month old and growing like crazy. He's sleeping better (most of the time), not that necessarily means I'm sleeping better. He really likes being held and cuddling while he sleeps, so usually I can get him to sleep, but if he's not completely out, he wakes up the minute I put him down in the bassinet. Then I go to pick him up and he conks out 2 seconds later. Then I try putting him down again... you get the idea. It's kinda a semi-annoying, semi-funny game at 2 am: ok, I'm asleep... no wait, I'm really awake... but now I'm really asleep... just joking, I'm awake!

Luca now has two new toys: an overhead gym from the director of the preschool I used to work at, which has really annoying music and flashing lights, and a bouncer from one of Chris's great aunts. When he is in the right mood he seems to enjoy both of these for short periods of time, although he doesn't quite have the muscle control yet to hit the toys that make the music play and I don't think he gets the whole cause and effect thing. Chris thinks once he makes the connection he's going to go around hitting things and expecting them to play music.

Luca and I went to post-natal yoga this week, which was wonderful. Chris and I don't have many friends with children, and it made me feel so normal to sit in a room full of women with babies. And to find out that other mothers deal with babies who cry when breast feeding, are fussy at night, and sleep for only an hour and a half at a time (even at six months!). It was also lovely to move my body again. (P.S. Yoga is way easier without a belly!) Chris and I also made it to a UWMBDA dance last week, thanks to Carla parents, who graciously offered to babysit. (P.P.S. Dancing is way, way easier without a belly, although my balance and core strength has gone all to hell.)

My biggest challenge is getting things done, other than nursing, eating, and sleeping. These three activities seem to take up the majority of my time, leaving me barely any time to file paperwork, do laundry, vacuum, do dishes, or any of the other chores I really would like to get done. And I'll be honest, that bugs me. I called my mother to commiserate, and usually she is a great confidant, able to reassure me about just about anything. (Yes, the belly will go down, you will fit back into your old clothes someday, etc.)

So expecting her usual reassurance I asked if I would ever again have time to "get things done". But this time she told me the exact opposite of what I expected to hear. Very bluntly she said no, "you will never, ever again, be able to organize your life with the perfection you want." This came as a hard blow to me, the perfectionist. But she did give me the advice she was given by a women who is probably the best teacher in the history of MMSD: "Your children will remember that you held them, read to them, loved them. They will not remember if the dishes were done and the socks were mated." (I remember that our socks were mated as a child, but only because I was forced into sock mating slave labor.)

So this week I have been doing my best to put aside my need to be "productive" and concentrated on the most important thing in my life: my son. I may not get things done with any speed anymore. I'm coming to terms with that. But when I can let go of everything else, curl up on the couch, and rock my son to sleep, that's when I'm happy.

Three Weeks Old

Luca is sleeping now. Age old wisdom says sleep when baby sleeps. I will blog when baby sleeps.

I haven't blogged since before Luca was born cause, well, I've been sick/busy/exhausted. The past three weeks have been, in a word, An Ordeal. I hesitate to rehash all that's happened, since it would take ages and I'm more a fan leaving the bad stuff behind and focusing on the positive, like my newborn son. But I do feel like I need catharsis. So for those of you who haven't gotten the full birth/immediately after birth story, here it is in shorthand:

Pitocin blah blah blah Three Hours of Pushing blah blah blah C-Section blah blah blah Stupid Epidural Doesn't Work blah blah blah 10lb Gargantu-baby blah blah blah Week In The Hospital blah blah blah Nursing Is NOT As Natural As We've Been Led To Believe blah blah blah Sore Nipples blah blah blah Nausea So Bad I Can't Get Out of Bed blah blah blah Why Doesn't Chris Get More Than Two Weeks Off?

Ok, I'm done. Moving on.

Luca is three weeks old today, and thankfully I'm feeling better, other than the obvious sleep deprivation. Luca's doing great. At his last doctor's appointment he weighed 11lbs 8oz and measured 23-3/4" long, a huge growth spurt in just the first few weeks. In fact his length for his age is off the percentile chart. His favorite activities are currently laying on his changing table (I have no idea why he likes it so much, but he's happy as a clam just sitting there) going for walks (well, they put him to sleep anyway) and watching with the mobile above his bassinet. He seems to have gotten a bit fussier this week, and for the past two nights he hasn't slept more than two hours at a time, but then he is supposed to be going through a growth spurt this week so Chris an I are hoping this is a passing phase. One encouraging piece of advice our pediatrician gave me is that newborns change every eight hours. So even the hard, annoying stuff is temporary.

Chris and my favorite activity is to cuddle with him on the couch and watch him make funny faces. He's becoming more aware of his surroundings, likes looking at faces, and from time to time even attempts a smile. He's also really strong and is already attempting to lift his head and shoulders. This makes breastfeeding a bit tricky, as he will fight me if he tries to put his head somewhere other than where he needs to put his head to latch correctly.

Definitely the hardest part for Chris and I has been what I call Luca's "inconsolable fussy periods", those times when he cries and cries for no apparent reason. I think this puts us in league with every other parent on the planet. But every day we learn a bit more, and it gets a bit easier. Such, I guess, is the life of a parent.

Two Weeks

Our son is two weeks today (actually, early this morning at 12:32 AM). A lot has happened in that time, and we've gone through funny and stressful situations.

Luca has been fine since he was born. (He has an appointment tomorrow, so I'll be sure to post an update then.) Kyra, on the other hand, has struggled a bit after the surgery. She had unusual abdominal pain that persisted for a few days. We ended up going to the doctor, then to the hospital for an abdominal ultrasound, and finally to the ER for an emergency CT scan. Everything was negative, except Kyra's pain receptors blaring at 8 out of 10 on the pain scale. Eventually, the pain subsided and just went away. We don't know what happened.

Then there's the nausea, which could be from a number of things, including her body recovering from the surgery, which included a massive anti-biotic and may have killed off her friendly bacteria, the ones that help her digest food; lack of sleep; or breast feeding, which has been a challenge unto itself.

We visited the lactation consultant (a nurse who is actually trained in lactation and breast feeding!), and Kyra practiced with the baby. He keeps falling asleep; then he also screams and is unable to eat because he's screaming (way to go, little guy--kind of self-defeating, isn't it?); and of course he is hungry all the time, giving Kyra as little as an hour to sleep or rest in between feeding.

Every day is different. I'm sure once Kyra has the time or energy she'll have plenty to say about all of this. Today sounded like it was okay. Things have been going better. Little by little. (Thanks to everyone for the encouragement!)

I'm back to work, now, too, so it's difficult for our family to be separated for 8 or more hours every day. I'd like to be at home to help with our new family member, but we do need to pay the bills with something (preferably cash, or so they tell me). Work is okay. I'm still doing a lot of training. I get the feeling one of my superiors really did not like the fact that I took an extra week off to help Kyra recover from the surgery. She never stopped by on my first day back to congratulate me or ask how we were doing. Almost everyone else did (except one of the guys, who doesn't seem too interested). At any rate, with some time, it should all be forgotten.

Eventually Kyra will be back to write again. And we'll write an entry about funny things babies do!

Update

Kyra is still recovering from the c-section and is having bouts of nausea and pain. The baby, on the other hand, is doing just fine! Last night we almost slept through the entire night, waking only to wake him to feed him, which we were told not to do at his first medical appointment today.

Everything else checked out just fine, including his weight, which we were slightly worried about since he lost 10% in the first few days. He regained most of it up to today, weighing 10 pounds, 7 ounces at the medical office.

Remember to keep checking our photos of the baby! We're taking many photos, and we'll keep adding more and more to the album since it's easier than posting them here one by one. Here is the link to the photo album:

Baby Photos

Note to Kyra:

Kyra, I am so proud of you! You have been extremely strong and dedicated, especially during your day of labor. Only you know how much strength it takes to attempt the impossible (giving birth to a baby who is too big!).

I know you weren't happy with having to do a c-section, and it's been difficult for you in the past couple of days coping with little sleep, feeding the baby, and recovering from surgery. But it's all worth it: You have helped a few little cells grow into a strong, beautiful baby boy.

You are a good mommy, and I am very proud of you! Stay strong, sweetheart!

-- Chris

Sleep-Talking

Sometimes when someone else is looking for something and they ask me about it, I'll say, jokingly, "I ate it." Sometimes when I'm looking for something, I ask someone else, jokingly, "Where is it?" then, "Did you eat it?" (using a tone to convey blame).

Last night I must have been dreaming about work. As I was sleeping, I woke up Kyra and asked, "Where is the data?" then, "Did you eat it?" She told me to roll over and go to sleep.

Later, early in the morning when we both woke up, she told me about it, and we laughed. I call this phenomenon sleep-talking, and I do it a lot when I haven't had enough sleep. Apparently it's called somniloquy (som-NIL-o-kwee) in science. I've done this for years, and it happened more often in college when I wasn't getting enough sleep on a regular basis. I suppose it will start to happen more and more after the baby arrives, so get ready for some humorous somniloquy jokes!