A Whole Lot of Nothing

"Wait, you can't go into labor tonight! House is on!" -- Chris

That statement was uttered a week ago. Since then I have had some form of contractions every single night. And still, as I approach week 41, I have no baby. As you can imagine I'm getting pretty annoyed.

Last night was probably the hardest though. Actually, the whole laughter inducing labor kinda worked. I was having contractions about 6-7 minutes apart by the time we got home. And these felt different, much stronger, more definite, and more painful that the others. As pessimistic as I have been about previous contractions becoming "real" labor, I was almost certain that last night was it. I got tired and tried to lay down, but it became too uncomfortable and I finally had Chris call the midwife and see if I could go in yet.

Now, I am not particularly fond of medical professionals, mainly due to the habit most of them have of not listening to their patients: if I say I'm sick/in labor then I'm sick/in labor and I should know cause it's my body. But I will give credit where credit is due: our midwives know what they are talking about. She said it still sounded like early labor and, depressingly, she was right. By morning the contractions had slowed and finally stopped altogether. I woke up before Chris did and was absolutely inconsolable. Chris tried to stay positive, pointing out that with all the contractions I had last night I was probably dilated at least another centimeter or two. (Thank you Darling, by the way. It means so much to me when you say things like that, and is immensely helpful. You make me so much stronger. I know this has been as hard for you as it has for me.)

Chris finally coaxed me back to bed before he went to work, and I felt much better after sleeping a few more hours. After I got up I went for my morning walk, as I've been doing every day this week. But I feel that for all I'm doing, nothing is helping, and this piecemeal labor is driving me nuts. I just keep thinking its never going to be "real" (as in the keeps going and results in a baby kind). On Friday we will talk to the midwife about induction options, and as set against them as I have been due to the negative effects on both mother and baby, part of me is tempted to just say "Yes, I 'm done, induce me, right here, right now".

My evil plan to avoid this (as if I had any control over my labor, ha!) is to somehow get my contractions to a strength, duration, and frequency for just long enough to get past triage and admitted to the hospital. Then even if the contractions stop, I'll at least be somewhere where I have a hope of getting them going again and following through with the whole process. Generally, once you are actually in a room they don't like to send you home, and I can stubbornly refuse to leave until they give me a baby. So that's what I'm working on now.

Dear baby: I love you and I can't wait to see your beautiful little face. Please come soon. -- Mom

Comment(s):

Marie said...

Odds are, if you aren't to 4 cm, they'll send you home anyway if you've been there 2-3 hours, even with regular contractions. Unless it's Friday, in which case you suddenly have a better than 50% chance for a c-section. The joys of modern medicine...

Nature, your body, and your baby all know exactly the right time. Be glad it's only been a week of contractions, perhaps? I had regular contractions for a few hours at a time for 6 weeks before Linnea showed up. Waiting for the little guy is just a lesson for being a parent - everything will happen in its own time, not according to any schedule you'd like to have it happen on.

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