Mommy and daddy didn't know they were going to have you. Then one day they found out. Daddy thought you might be a girl. Mommy and daddy found a girl name long before they found a boy name. Boy's names are silly, after all.
You grew and grew inside mommy. Mommy got so big! She was so big she almost couldn't fit through a door! We listened to your heartbeat as you got bigger and bigger.
Daddy finally thought of a good name for you. It's hard to pick a baby boy's name!
Then one day we thought you were going to arrive. But you didn't! We were so sad. We thought for sure we would meet you soon. And then every day after we thought you would arrive. But you didn't want to come out!
So one day we went to the hospital to evict you. After all, you weren't paying rent! You were supposed to move out! And you weren't getting any smaller either. Mommy went into surgery, and even then you didn't want to come out. They had to pull you out by your head!
Then daddy saw you for the first time. The doctors cleaned you up, and daddy snipped your umbilical cord. Then you got your first hat.
Daddy held you for a long time after that. We were waiting for mommy. Both of us wanted to see her! You wanted to see her so much you cried and daddy had to shush you!
Then mommy came out, and she was too tired to hold you! So daddy took you to see our family. Then we came back to see mommy, and she held you for the first time.
For a whole week, mommy and daddy were really tired! You kept crying and wanting to eat! You and daddy had "guy time" when you were awake and mommy was sleeping. We would talk, just like right now.
Now you keep growing exponentially! You're so big!